Friday, September 21, 2007

I Am A Wife and Mother


Here is a post from Feb 2005. I had just started blogging. This details some of the beginning of our foster care journey.



I am a wife to a wonderful godly man. We met on the internet at ChristianMatchmaker.com about 6 years ago next month. We have been married for four years. He is my Mr. Steady and I love him for it. About two and a half years ago I decided I wanted to be a foster parent. He grinned and agreed. My Mr. Steady. We worked on paperwork and classes and homestudies for about 4 months and we were ready to go. Unfortunatly due to high turnover at the agency, lost paperwork, privitization, and just plain incompetance it took us a year and a half to get licensed. The day after we got licensed we got a little boy. He was 13 months old when we got him, he is now 22 months old. He has blond hair and blue eyes and because of confidentiality I will have to call him A on the blog. He is so smart and happy and friendly. We could not have asked for a better child. We almost got to adopt him but things happen and now his parents are working on their case plan. They still have about 6 months - a year to go so you never know what will happen. We might still get to adopt him. Its all in God's hands. In September of 2004 we got two little girls. They were sisters, 1 and 2. The one year old had little blond curls and was always smiling and wanting to be held. She was an angel. The 2 year old had brown hair and the most amazing blue eyes. She was so very very smart it was amazing. They went to live with their grandparents in October. The day they left I called placement and said I needed them to fill the two beds that were just vacated. Sure enough I got a phone call for three little girls. I could only take two so they brought me the younger two. K is 4 almost 5 and has blond hair (almost frosted looking the kind people pay good money for) she is so incredibly beautiful. T is 3 years old and has light brown hair and blue eyes and a smile that would knock you down. She is so cute! Their sister K is 7 almost 8 and has brown hair and dark brown eyes. She is so pretty. She lives in a different foster home right now because we dont have room in our car for her. We are praying daily for a minivan. The girls will probably go up for adoption sometime this year we so would like to adopt them but have not even mentioned it because we have not been able to move the older girl over yet. They will have to be adopted together. I would not have it any other way. I tell you all that because I want you to know how happy I am. Since I was 4 years old I always knew I wanted a lot of children. I think when I was 11 I decided 10 would be a good number. I always knew I wanted to marry my prince charming and on December 15, 2000 I did. I desperately want a baby of my own to hold but God has not blessed us there yet. He has however given me many children and I believe the promise of many more. I love being a wife and mommy but I always have to remember that first I am a child of God. You see my God is a jealous God (Exodus 20:5) He wants me to put NOTHING ahead of Him. I have to remember that as I rush around in the morning forgetting prayer and Bible reading. My husband can not come before God and neither can my precious precious children. Another thing I need to remember, and I learned this before I even got married, my husband is number 2! Not my children. Not my friends. Not my church. Not my family. And most assuredly not myself. I heeded the teaching of older wiser women in the Lord who chastened me to always put my husband before my children. You see one day your children will be grown and gone and you will still be looking across the dinner table at the man you married. Don't let that man be a stranger. The Bible tells us that woman was made for her husband (1 Corinthians 11:9). Not for her children. Please dont neglect your children. God does not want that either. Titus 2:4 tells us we are to love our children. But neither should you neglect your husband for your children. Im trying to think of an example and I asked Prince Charming, "What is something I do to make you feel like you are a higher priority than the children?" His response, "Everything you do." Any doubt why I love this man?? :) Ok here is a small one. Say your child asks to have spaghetti for dinner and hubby asks for meatloaf, mashed potatoes, corn on the cob, and fresh baked bread. You would rather cook one pot spaghetti! Come on admit it...... ;) But you should cook the BIG meal hubby wants. Its just the right thing to do. But do have spaghetti one night soon for your child. My third priority is my children. Those three little angels who sometimes try every bit of patience I have. Last week in particular seemed to be a trying week. Because we are foster parents we have people in and out of our house all the time to see the children. The house was a wreck, the baby was sick, and I was on the phone with the girl's Guardians Ad Litem ( two of the sweetest people in the world) who wanted to come out and visit. So K and I ran around like chickens with our heads cut off trying to get at least the living room and the foyer looking decent. We did and I even had time to sit down and breathe before they came. Everything went great. The baby and I had many issues this past week though. He was sick and very whiny and wanted to be held. Now here is something about me that a lot of people might not know, when we take those spiritual gifts tests I always come in lowest on M-E-R-C-Y. My little guy obviously did not know that. For his safety and my sanity he spent a lot of time sleeping while he was sick... :) Im not a completly awful mommy I did hold him a lot but when I just could not take it anymore he ended up in bed where he promptly went to sleep. So it was all good. I believe that being a mommy is a special calling. I always feel like I am somehow missing something and striving to be a better mother. I know that I know that I know that I want my little ones to have a spiritual foundation and I strive every day to bring that about. They are fascinated with God and Jesus and enjoy just sitting down and flipping through their Bibles. The girls enjoy looking at the Bible so much they each got their very own for Christmas. We have nightly Bible reading and prayer as a family and the girls are in the Cubbies program with AWANA and we go over the Bible stories in thier Cubby books every morning. I have also found a Protestant catechism that I want to start the 4 year old girl and possible my three year old girl on. I also do the majority of the discipline since I am home all day with them. Prince Charming has delegated this duty to me and I strive to do a good job so that he can always trust in me. (Proverbs 31:11) I have a verse printed on my heart and when I look at my children I whisper this verse to myself. 3 John 1:4 I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth. This is what I desire for my children. That they walk in truth. Well that is a little about me and my family. I hope that you will tell me about your families and what you are doing. I am always looking for wisdom for my role as a wife and a mother

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