Problems at school?!

So ever since we sent the eight year old to school we have had behavior problems with her..not really bad ones but things that need to be dealt with now so they dont manifest. I think they have been manifesting for eight long years. She has had inconsistent to harsh discipline her whole life so now we are trying to win her with consistency. She is also not doing well in school. She is on medication for ADHD which she is supposed to be coming off of at the end of the year, praise God. We are at this point trying to teach her that she is responsible for her actions and that she cant rely on her medication to make her do well in school or to be good. She has been taught for so long that her medicine is a crutch. And her teacher makes sure to ask her daily if she has taken her medicine..especially on days she gets in trouble. "Hey lady!" I want to yell," Can you work with us to get her off of this crutch? Can you help us teach her to be responsible for herself?" No of course she cant she has 20 other students that she has to figure out if they are on their medication. No offense to the people who take it and might need it but my eight year old sure does not. I hate it when she is on this stuff. She acts like a total zombie! She was on Strattara read this article to find out what mood altering drugs can do to our children! Anyways I digress. It is hard to be consistent with her when she leaves me at 8:15am in the morning and returns home at 3:00pm in the afternoon. Then I get these vague reports of how she did during the day..,"She talked during a test. She tied her shoe laces together...etc... " Im not sure if Im hearing the whole story. Im not sure what the child was doing...its hard to punish or know how to punish when you have no clue what was going on! Also its hard to be consistent..she is not allowed to do something at home that may be perfectly acceptable at school. Where is the consistency?
Another problem is what my child is bringing home from school (aside from head lice..weekly!??!?!?!??!?) The other day she informed me we are part of the ape family..."no dear," I calmly explained. "Oh yeah, we used to be apes..." "My love, someone is teasing you! The Bible says God made us as man and woman." I tell her ever so gently... for those of you who know me you know my head was spinning and flames were shooting from my ears. I had to keep reassuring the child she was in no danger but that she should definitely tell her teacher to hide under her desk for the next few days! After we cleared up that neither she nor I nor her little brothers and sisters looked, smelled, or talked like apes therefore we must be different she and I explored the story of the creation in the Bible .I think she is a little more comfortable with it now.
KA's reading which she was doing well with at the end of the summer (B.U. before us) has just gone down the tubes! She is doing well with spelling but her reading comprehension is deplorable. Some weeks she does great other weeks I just sign all the "F" papers and remind her she has to focus and not talk or play around. We are fighting an uphill battle. One we are prepared to win!
So what should we do about little Miss "I really need some help here guys!" ? Well hubby and I have decided that as soon as the adoption is finalized she is coming home. We wanted to wait until next year so as not to disrupt her too much but the longer I wait the more problems pop up. When I take her out of school we will focus mainly on reading and comprehension and some math. For the months leading to next August that is it. I will use The Well Trained Mind method of reading, dictation, copy work, and working with manipulatives in Math. Simply addition and subtraction for now because I dont know that she has a firm grasp of it. I think I will be using the Five In A Row books for her for the rest of the year to give her some reading practice and for a laid back approach as she and I adjust. I dont know yet about the kindergarten. She is doing well in school so we might prayerfully consider letting her finish the year.
At this point I will be starting my soon to be first grader in Saxon 1 Math next year and the almost third grader in Saxon Math 2. I will also be using the Story of The World book 1 for both of the girls. WTM recommends starting at the beginning of history no matter where you come in and it makes it easier to have the two of them on the same schedule. These are the two curriculums I have almost completely decided on the other subjects are up in the air at this point..Im still researching. A lot has been going on to make my head just spin with the knowledge being poured into it. Im excited and apprehensive at the same time. The message boards at WTM have helped me immensely. So far they have not laughed at any of my questions. Well I guess I have babbled on enough about this today. Im so excited that you will probably see it popping up around some more here though!