I truly struggled with the title. While I want to continue these stories, that by the way hubby finds wildly amusing, and stick with the theme of delightful stories, the rest of the Paul story does not end delightfully.
However my memories of Paul are still delightful, so I will continue the theme.
I forgot to mention our 8th grade formal. Let me touch on that briefly before moving into the Paul years part two. He wore a suit and tie, I wore a flowery dress. He never left my side. He got me drinks and snacks all evening. Were we together on a "date" at the dance? Not that I knew of. Did his face get red and did he cut in when another guy friend asked me to dance? Yes. Did he refuse to dance with another girl on the last dance, "ladies" choice? Yes. Why? Because he wanted me to ask him. She just beat me to it. She grabbed his hand and walked him out there. He turned to look back at me. I walked over and asked him to dance. He said, "Of course. Who else?" He was so sweet and such a gentleman.
Of course I was obsessive. We were starting highschool in the fall. We had assigned days to pick our schedules. His, thankfully, was before mine. I called another friend and she found out his schedule, very shrewdly I might add. On the day I went to pick my classes I was signed up for all the same classes. Well, actually I was at camp, so my mom signed me up for the classes I'd already selected. Funny. He commented one time on the fact we were in almost all the same classes. I put on my innocent face and said, my mom signed me up for my schedule. Not a lie necessarily. Freshmen had to share lockers. We buddied up with people in our English class. Two of Paul's guy friends asked him to share a locker, he turned around, smiled at me and said, "Nah, I have my locker buddy," with a smile and a wink. My heart thudded right out of my chest. We spent days walking with each other to class. When he bought lunch he always got an extra order of "tots" to share. When I bought lunch I grabbed an extra oatmeal raisin cookie for him. We spent afternoons in the library after school doing homework together. That was actually my best year academically. Did I metion Paul made straight A's in middle school?
We had a long discussion one day about "us". We were best friends, but at 14 he did not want a "relationship". He was pretty mature looking back. He nudged me when he said it and smiled. I knew that I would wait for him to be ready. Ahhh, the dreams of youth. LOL.
My other guy friends, remember the geeky ones from back in middle school. The ones I still love. They all grew up over the summer. They all showed up with deeper voices and longer legs that first day back in highschool. They were not the "hottest" guys around, but in my book still the best catch. Sweet, smart and funny. One guy in particular, Jason, was the sweetest. He and Paul were good friends. He used to get so mad at Paul for not "liking" me. Later, Paul told me he thought Jason had his own crush on me. Sweet boy. See my self esteem was not the greatest. I loved being around these people who were not the most popular or the hottest, because I knew I could be myself and they would still care. Jason and I stayed friends all the way through highschool. He is the last person I expect to see at the reunion, but one of the ones I want to see the most. Another one, Neil will will also reapper later in the Delightful Stories series. He was always trying to make me laugh. It was funny because he was usually so serious. But he liked making me laugh. I would love to see him at our reunion.
My girlfriends through this time were..... well questionable. They were more boy crazy than me, if you can imagine that. They come more into play in the Sophomore year of highschool. Lets just say even being boy crazy I had values and standards. They really did not. I thank God that He watched over and protected me in those years.
Back to Paul. At the end of ninth grade he and I had a rift. I still dont know what it was about. He started backing away from our friendship. I was dejected and hurt. We made up a little bit, but never regained the closeness. I had my yearbook and was going to ask him to sign it one day. He snapped at me and I walked away shattered. I said I would not ask again. On the last day of school I left early. He called me that night to ask why I did not say good bye or let him sign my yearbook. I cried on the phone with him. I felt so dumb. I hate crying in front of people. We met for lunch at the mall not long after. He apologized for being a jerk for the last few weeks. I apologized for crying, and not saying goodby. I never did let him sign my yearbook.
In 10th grade he joined our crew team. He stuck with us for a few more months but eventually the life of crew took over. He was hanging out with new people and new friends. He and I still talked in the halls occasionally. We both ended up in summer school for Algebra 2 after 10th grade. He was...different. Not so gentlemanly anymore. Not rude or wild, just kind of a know it all teenager. Trying to fit in and be popular. Ya know? We had a good time in summer school, but it was more buddy-buddy. One time right before summer school was over he and I were sitting on a bench outside during break. We were sharing a soda laughing at something stupid. He shuffled his feet, gave me his lopsided grin and asked, "What happened to us?" I shrugged, handed him the soda and walked away. I remember that day so vividly.
We shared an AP European History class our Senior year. By then he was a complete stranger. He sat right beside me. I talked to the girl on the other side of me who I did not know from Adam more than I talked to him. He gave me a note one time during one of the teachers lectures. It said, "Hi, I miss you." I looked over to see his lopsided grin. I threw the note away that night after reading it 1000 times. We graduated and I never saw or heard from him again.
I know now what happened to us. God had a much bigger plan. He had a stable Christian guy out there for me to fall madly in love with. God knew what I needed much much more than I did. I needed Roy. I needed him to be strong. I needed him to say,"no" when he knew something was not right for me. I need Roy, so I could be safe and secure that nothing except death would ever seperate us. Unfortunatly as you'll see I had to go through a lot more "heartache" before I realized that.
What happened to Paul?
I heard on our highschool alumni message board about a year ago that he'd committed suicide a few years back. I have asked everyone I could think of for more details. They have none. I still get weepy when I think about him and the tragic end.
What would have happened to me if God had answered my foolish prayer of youth with a yes??? Would I be a widow? Would I have turned from God, because my husband had no faith in Him? Thank you God for sparing me that prayer. Please God be with the family he left behind.
Hey Paul, "Hi, I miss you too, friend."
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